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Forty days and forty nights
The judge sentenced Paris Hilton for driving without headlights
And no valid drivers license to her name
To send a message to the world
That The California Department of Motor Vehicles is not a game
From her My Space web site Paris issued a worldwide plea
Do not allow this injustice to befall on me
Let's face it, I'm not a penniless schmuck from East LA
If it’s just a matter of money I’m prepared to pay
Oh please do not send me to LA County Jail
Where Crips and Bloods and convicted sex offenders dwell
Without my herpes medicine my butt will break out in a rash
There’s nothing in that jail that I can buy with all my cash
With a hue and cry the world’s masses arose to action
The French ambassador to LA demanded satisfaction
The Pope in Rome released a Latin encyclical
Pleading that the LA County Jail was already too full
Mass demonstrations filled the streets of Cairo and Islamabad
And the president of Mexico said in a speech that
Anybody who loved Chihuahuas can’t be all bad
A pardon finally reached the desk for Governor Schwartznegger to sign
But unfortunately for Paris the Governator declined
He said “If you do the crime you have to do the time
“Forty-five days in the pokey is no jokey
“And in the joint you won’t have no weed to smoky
“But in your cell you can read the Bible and meditate
“And during your recreation period you can exercise and lift weights
“Look at it this way, you’ll be out in a month and your life won’t be over
“And with all the loot you got you can afford to hire a chauffeur”
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Posted on 5/8/2007
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