Sperm City

Are you tired of having lazy, mentally defective children who:

· Dress Like Bums?

· Hate School?

· Smoke Rope?

· Wango-ze-Tango Until Four AM?

You may be a victim of FAULTY GENES!!!!

The chart here tells the story. In Graph A we have a happy, healthy sperm cell. Note his smiling face! Sperm Cell A can’t wait to begin his Long Trek up the uterine canal to the womb, there to meet the egg of his dreams and develop into a happy, healthy kid who:

· Gets Straight A’s in School

· Has a Part-Time Job

· Is Captain of the Football Team (or the cheerleading squad)

· Dreams of Becoming MAYOR OF NEW YORK CITY!

There are many reasons for Faulty Genes:

· Tight Pants

· Self-Abuse

· DRUG ADDICTION

SO WHY TAKE CHANCES!!!???

Come On Down to Sperm City in the Paramus Mall where we have a friendly and knowledgeable staff of 60 Genetic Engineers ready to talk to you about your needs! Sperm City is a division of SPERMCO INTL. with branches in forty countries. Our worldwide computer network enables us to draw from a gene pool of over ONE TRILLION PEOPLE, thereby assuring you THE KID OF YOUR DREAMS! We have a clone to fit your budget, be it that of an industrial drone or a Nobel laureate. We can fix you up with an itinerant tobacco picker or an Olympic pole vault champion, SO COME ON DOWN!

To the first hundred people who come in and say “Dick Sent Me,” we will give, absolutely free of charge, our new, easy-insert applicator in Traditional or Italian Hi-Tech design.

Come On Down Saturday when Mayor Ed Krotch and Governor Mario Homo will be giving away free condoms to everybody wearing an I Luv NY Jockstrap.

Vaginavisa and Masturbacard Welcome.

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Posted on 10/24/2005 ( Permanent Link )
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